Time to cast a critical eye toward Lonely Island’s new song “I Just Had Sex”. It’s catchy as all hell and kind of makes me want to dance. But in my repeated viewing, I’ve gone back and forth as to whether or not the video (which has been widely viewed–20 million as of today) sends positive messages about sex to women.
Macroscopically speaking, “I Just Had Sex” parodically humanizes the experience of sex, and reminds the viewer that everybody does it. It also humorously makes a statement about appropriate discourse of sexual encounters. But I do have a few complaints–mainly, that the video implies sex is something men “do” to women (i.e. “It’s sure nice of her to let you do that thing”, “I’m so humbled by her ability to let me do her”, “Thanks for letting us fuck you”). My own experience begs to differ ;)
Seriously though, the song is pretty heteronormative (to be expected in the mainstream, unfortunately), and when an intimate act becomes someone “doing something” to another, it silences the experience of the other person. They become the passive receptor of whatever it is you’re “doing” to them. The internalization of this message would be unfortunate for both parties involved; for women, it is disempowering, and for the men, it romanticizes a watered-down version of the exchange that sex COULD facilitate.
Despite these gripes, I love the song. The embarrassed and annoyed looks of the women in the background serve to make us laugh, but also to remind us that such behavior makes men look like a complete jackasses. It even apologizes for all the men that actually DO act like that…so, thanks Akon, I might be able to see past your awful grammarz now.