I went to Safeway last night and was confronted with a huge, bright red Valentine’s display near the entry way. Cards, stuffed animals, balloons, chocolates, and a whole host of other useless red items obstructed my path.
Every year I experience the same emotions during Valentines.
First: “WTF is all this red? EYES HURTING.”
Second: “Wow, if this isn’t a pile of useless overly-priced shit, I don’t know what is!”
Third (usually around Feb 15th, when the shelves are depleted): “Oh. People actually buy this stuff.”
And then I think fondly of Mr. Wootsy, the stuffed bear my partner gave me when I was 16 that is now god knows where.
Valentine’s Day, like a bunch of other american holidays, seems like the most blatant corporate scam to get you to buy useless crap that I’ve ever seen. Yet…it works! Genius. For me, buying me some expensive chocolates that will buy me an extra 5 hours at the gym and a mass-produced teddy bear isn’t as cute as it was when I was younger. Valentine’s Day is a great excuse to celebrate love and sex, but why is it celebrated using such artificial means? How does this $20 plushie that you bought 5 minutes before coming over say anything about our relationship to each other? Yeah, I know, I sound like a cynical heartless bitch….but I promise I’m not ;)
What I mean is: if I’m going to be a forced cultural participant, show me you care every day of the year, not just the one where stores happen to have a number of obnoxious red displays. If you want Valentine’s Day to be extra special for the hell of it, then bring on a long day together of comfortable chatter and amazing sex. And hey, for people who are into “gifts”, why shouldn’t we get something we can BOTH enjoy? Oh baby. I see Valentine’s Day as merely a light-hearted excuse (not an exclusivity) to spend time together, to celebrate our connection, and make each other feel amazing in meaningful, lasting ways.
On valentines day, I wear all black in protest. The concept is just so absurd… the idea that we need a specific day to celebrate love, sex and romance. It’s nice to have a reminder, a reset every so often… since we tend to lapse into comfortable routines devoid of romance. Still, as you’ve said, the whole idea is engineered to make us buy useless garbage.
Little known fact, so is the desire for diamond engagement rings. Somewhere along the lines, someone figured out that they could make a lot of money by selling diamonds if they made people feel as if they were necessary for a proper engagement ring. Not to mention that they artificially engineer scarcity by hording diamonds to keep the price up. In any case, they’re certainly not necessary for a property ring… but that doesn’t stop people from thinking they are. Many women judge the quality of the groom by the size/quality of the diamond. It’s sad really… even relatively poor people are spending thousands of dollars, which they DON’T HAVE, to buy expensive wedding rings. In many instances, paying off the ring for years. High divorce rates are also good for diamond sales… since it’s taboo and/or bad luck to use the rings from the previous wedding.
Hmmm, I think Valentine’s day is pointless. It’s cute and all to say to that other person “Hey, yeah, love your face!” but like you can say that any day. I remember your valentines video, that was good.
St. Patricks day isn’t a sell out day really :P It’s huge here in Ireland, when Christianity came here to Ireland, and since then all the religious folks have turned it into a mad session. I’m not religious, but letting all the oul’ ones go to mass and have a ball is kinda funny. Plus the folk tales of St. Patrick and all the Irish stories are really important to our culture. I guess it’s a matter of opinion on that one :) Cool post, Laci! :D x
So should I cancel those flowers I’ve sent to you Laci :P
Now I remember the video you did last year on St Valentine and the reason we do (apprantly) celebrate it, but I am still of the opinion that it is a holiday created by the greeting card industry to increase the poor sales between Christmas and New Year.
The problem is however, that girlfriends tend to get a tad upset if you don’t get them those cheap chocolates/cards/stuffed bear etc at this time of year. I’m sure there are guys that get upset, but for the most part, it is women (steriotypical, I know, but its true). So whilst I do agree that you should show your partner love all year around, you have to, unfortunately, show more on 14th Feb.
I agree, I have a similar problem with Christmas. Overly hyped, ad driven, and commercially exploited way to force shopping.
What ever happened to the remembrance of the birth in this alleged holiday?
What do gifts have to do with it?
BAH HUM BUG to all holidays that require gift giving as the point.
Quick true story. I was working at a popular retail store, the new owner took away most paid holidays, including Easter but not Christmas.
I asked him why he did not consider Easter a worthy holiday. His reply was that it was a religious holiday. I then asked then what the heck is Christmas, a non-religious holiday?
He had no answer!
By the way, Happy Valentine’s season Laci.
I agree, Laci. Valntine’s Day is way over done. Just wanted to say thanks for all the awesome videos and blogs – always look forward to hearing what you have to say ;)
-Shannon
Heck, I find the whole Valentines day a contradiction… A day when everyone is expected to be romantic, what could you ever do that day that is really romantic?
Skip Valentines day and give your partner small gifts or a romantic evening on any random day, thats showing you really care instead of just doing as expected…
most people take each other for granted and valentine’s is a reminder to show each other they still care, sad but true. from what i’ve seen, the generic junk that fills the stores around this time are for kids and that “puppy love”.
my birthday is on Valentines Day, so i always get a present.
oooooooo yeaaaaaaa
Valentines Day is a pointless day, it’s a day to celebrate current relationships with people but for the ones that have no one it is a useless day that reminds people of not having people give them random shit on this day.
I have friends who cry themselves to sleep when no one gives them anything so i wonder how much :love: will be on the air this year when it’s a monday
I bake something for my boyfriend for Valentine’s Day. I never buy him anything specific, then we both enjoy it. I mean, how can you not like cupcakes or cookies? Even if they are heart-shaped.
I think people make a huge deal over Valentine’s Day for nothing. It’s really not a significant day in the year, so single people should enjoy it just as much. I know I did when I was single.
Just be careful not to put a downer on people who are gun-ho about it. Over-priced, overrated day or not, some people really enjoy it!
Baking is always a win situation. :)
I once gave a rose to a gf that costed a dollar with a tag that said “i maybe be an asshole but i am your asshole”. it said that because we recently argued about something. I cant remeber what it was.
I totally get what you’re saying, and in a way I agree with you. Buying those stupid pink gifts on display don’t really mean anything. I do gifts on Valentine’s day, but mine always come straight from the heart. I spend weeks putting together something incredibly personal, something she will love, something completely unique that can’t be bought anywhere, and if it could, it wouldn’t mean the same to them.
I also agree that you should celebrate love everyday, but I feel like we really have no choice but to celebrate it especially hard on Vday. I’d feel a little guilty if all of my girl’s best friends did something special on Valentine’s day and she didn’t get something special too. Social expectations suck, but still, if she got nothing special on Valentine’s Day and everyone else did, she would feel a little let down I think.
Most of the blogs online are pretty much the same but i think you have a unique blog. Cheers !
I agree entirely. My lover and I celebrate valentine’s day by not spending any money at all, or if we do spend money, it is to make the standard rice and sometimes beans/corn that is really all we can afford on grad-student budgets. I was obsessed with the holiday when I was single, obsessed and of course depressed, because of what society at large was telling me. Once I met my lover, though, and we discussed pretty early on how much of a sham the holiday is (I celebrate her every day of the year anyway), something just clicked in my mind, and aside from some slight bitterness directed at someone who dumped me through a Dear John letter on Valentine’s day some years ago (this will sound horrible, but my bitterness has been softened by the fact that she has become a truly ugly person in both body and character), Valentine’s day is just another day.
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Awesome informative post. Thanks for helpful article.
I’m a admirer of flowers and baking. So naturally I enjoy seeing and smelling all the floral maddness when I go into stores. And for me growing up in a family where cooking/baking isn’t something that is appreciated was depressing. The one time everyone would come together to eat was just sad. I turn that shit all sorts of around when I bake/cook something for someone, and V-day just gives me an accuse to make myself and/or my friends feel special when surrounding my sureal Vday vomit of pink teddy bears and heart shaped boxes of chocolates.
I’m glad it was useful to me. Thanks for your work. Ill be in touch
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Yeah, I’m pretty sure Valentine’s Day was invented to make people feel bad about being single xD
What about something that isn’t mass produced? Like a handmade teddy bear. I can only make paper airplanes, so I wouldn’t want this to become a trend.
Hey! I like Valentines… and It’s not a manufactured holiday by corporates, it’s a holiday that literally dates back thousands of years, so it’s just exploited by companies. Get it right, geez.