Saggy Boobs (NSFW)

email time!

Hi Laci! So there’s something I’m really insecure about. My breasts. I’m sixteen years-old, my cup size is 36 C-D, and I tend to hunch over a lot, but my breasts are quite saggy. I hate it and it’s something I’m really insecure about, especially when I see other women with ‘perfectly perky’ golden globes. I’m scared that when I decide to get intimate with someone that they’re going to find me unattractive. I’m quite a confident person, and I’m fine with my body except for this/these. Do you possibly have any answers on how to make them better, or at least help me be not as insecure?
-Much love and thanks, J.

Ah, the ol’ “saggy boobs” conundrum. Yet another way that thousands of females come to feel shitty about themselves because of the absurd beauty standards we are held to. Saggy boobs are typically associated with “old women”, which is one of the reasons why they are considered “ugly”. We do not value the beauty of women as they age, only when they look young (notice the obsession with youth in the beauty industry).

While men are affected to some degree, it’s not nearly as bad. It’s a widely-held notion that men become more attractive as they age.

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50 More Ways To Be Sex Positive!

In this week’s sex+ called “The Slut Shamer“, I used a variety of mini-skits to give some basic principles of sex positivity. Here are 50 more things that I do to complement my sex positive lifestyle. Help grow this list by sharing your ways in the comments! Can you think of more ways to be sex positive? :)

explore & find out what feels good!

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A Crash Course on Anorexia

In today’s sex+ I covered some thoughts on the anorexia, including:
I. Pro-anorexia blogging communities
II. The spiral into anorexia
III. The difference between dieting & an eating disorder
IV. What’s behind an eating disorder: more than weight
V. What causes anorexia – personal characteristics of anorexics
VI. Why anorexia affects more women than men – cultural theories

This article will fill in the gaps to give a fuller understanding of anorexia, including:
I. Defining and classifying anorexia
II. Anorexia statistics
III. Identifying anorexia in someone else
IV. Could you be anorexic?
V. What anorexia does to your body
VI. How anorexia is treated
VII. How to help someone with anorexia

What is anorexia?
Anorexia Nervosa is referred to as an eating disorder and a mental disorder and is socially transmitted. It is defined as:
-Refusal to maintain a healthy body weight
-Fear of gaining weight
-Distorted body image

The life and thoughts of an anorexic revolve around their weight and eating habits. Mealtimes are points of stress in the endless pursuit of losing more weight. No matter how skinny someone with anorexia becomes, they never feel it is good enough. Those with anorexia will, in general, adamantly deny that they need intervention.
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Love you.

I made a sex+ valentine for you.

Not wanting to rehash the same cynicism I’ve expressed in past years, I decided to do something different this Valentine’s Day. We often talk about relationships as a society – romantic relationships, that is. Those seem to get more glory and attention than any other kind of relationship. Namely, our relationship with ourselves….which I feel is never talked about it.

Something that has really changed for me in my latest romantic relationship is my journey toward self-awareness and self-love. Learning to love myself has made my romantic relationship infinitely more fulfilling and wonderful, as well as making day-to-day living more enjoyable. I tried to capture a piece of my personal journey for you here in this video. I hope it will uplift you, inspire you, make you think, and offer you some tips to love yourself every day.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Love you,


Chest Binding Guide

I can haz emailz?

Hi Laci! I’m a female that identifies as male, and I’ve been curious about maybe trying to bind my chest (in a healthy manner). I’ve heard about all of these ways to bind your chest, but so many of them seem to have these side effects or health issues. Like one friend of mine tried to bind herself using Ace bandages (which, as you know, compress), so she unknowingly was binding her chest with bandages that compressed! I’m sorry if this is a really random question, but…Do you think you could help me out with a nice, safe way to chest bind?

I once tried binding my boobs down when I was in high school. My friends and I somehow decided that DUCT TAPE was a good idea. Dear lord….never again! I thought that shit was going to pull my nipples clean off.

Yeah….I know. Lesson learned.

For those who are wondering, FTM (female to male – female sex/male gender) binding is pretty common as a way to alter gender expression. Chest binding is also used for cosplay or to cross dress. While Duct Tape is the bottom of the barrel, Ace bandages are not a very sustainable idea either. These bandages work in a way that causes them to become tighter/less flexible every time they are used, which with multiple uses could: warp your ribcage, weaken your chest muscles, cause fluid to build up in your lungs, or other serious back harm. Do not want.

To reduce (though not eliminate) the risk of injury by binding with an Ace bandage:

(1) Use each bandage only a couple times.
(2) Don’t bind for longer than 8 hours.
(3) Don’t bind too tightly (try puffing your chest up while you’re binding).
(4) Wear something under it to prevent digging & binding too tightly (tank tops, t-shirts, and sports bras seem to work well for this).
(5) Stretch a little once it’s on – this helps, especially if it comes out a little lopsided. Take a deep breath, hug yourself, and twist back and forth a few times.

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